“Push.....Push....Yes...Yes...Push it harder.”
“Is it out??”
“Give it another try. You will soon see a new face.”
And my final ordeal began. The empyrean excitement to hold for the first time, a life which I could say is OURS, filled me with a tremendous flow of fluid to make it even easier for me. I could feel the uncontrolable urge to push it out as fast as possible. All women out there would understand. I could fancy a happy complete family of mine. I just needed to push it a little harder. It was choking me heavily to death, but still I was ready to take all fear & pain for the sweet dream I saw. I was scared to hurt the new one while I clambered. Each time I tried to push, it came out to the tip of my tongue.... but, again slickly slipped back all the way deep into my heart as I drank away my saliva to slacken my strained nerves.
“Could you let it out this time?”
“No. I couldn’t”.
"But what went wrong this time???"
My words tried to come out kicking back at my heart with all force. But I could not speak out a single word. With a bated breath, I kept struggling to say. They kept encouraging me. But my fear to face something unacceptable held me back... What if I give birth to a dead child??? And what if the child is derelicted by this cruel world??? I knew...the longer I held it back, the remote became my chances to feel the first touch of a new RELATIONSHIP. I left it to time & fate knowing that it would be even painful for me to helplessly witness my apprehensions come true than to keep struggling with my words forever inside. I am still going through LABOUR PAIN.